How to Stop Being Negative All the Time
By Chuck Fenwick
Overcoming a Persistently Negative Attitude
It’s easy to slip into a pattern of negativity. There’s something that happens every day that could have been better, that should have happened differently, or that made your day at least 1% worse.
But you can fight the pessimism! It’s possible to work towards overcoming negativity.
Not in a “toxic positivity” type of way. Just in a mindset-shifting kind of way.
Here are three ways you can retrain your brain and overcome negative tendencies.
Practice Pre-Framing
You probably know what re-framing is, but pre-framing is possible, too! When you approach a situation, how are you entering into it? Do you strive to go in with a positive and realistic outlook? Or do you tend to head into situations with a negative attitude?
Your mindset can drastically impact the outcome of your situation. Enter pre-framing. If you tend to be more of a glass-half-empty person, consider trying this.
If there’s a situation you’re entering into – a dreaded family dinner or a long work week – set your expectations realistically.
This isn’t a time for over-the-top positivity. It’s a time to be realistic! If you know it will be a long work week, reserve some time on the calendar for rest. If you’re not going to enjoy a family dinner, plan for a fun dessert with your spouse or friend.
Foresee the potential negatives and try to combat the bad with some good.
Express Thankfulness for the Past
You’ve heard it before – hindsight is 20/20.
Usually, that phrase is in reference to something you shouldn’t have done, and now you can look back and realize that.
But I think it applies to other parts of life, too.
There have been several times throughout my life when I thought I knew 100% how something was going to work out.
I was so sure of the situation, but it didn’t happen as I had anticipated.
At the time, this can feel disappointing. And it’s easy to see the negativity.
But now, looking back, I know everything worked out even better than I could have imagined.
So when you’re feeling all of the negativity from a situation, pause and remember the past. Reflect on the experiences you’ve lived through before. There will most likely be some good that comes from the bad parts this time, too.
Seek Out the Good
It’s easy to end the day by calculating all of the bad things that have happened.
You mentally list everything that went wrong or could have been a lot better. It’s just natural to focus on the negativity sometimes.
But what if you shifted your thought patterns? Throughout the day, try to find something good. Something that was positive. Maybe your coffee tasted extra great in the morning. Or your least favorite meeting ended a bit earlier than usual. Maybe the sun is shining after a long, dark winter – or you’re making your favorite food for dinner.
Adjusting your mindset is the most powerful way to overcome a negative situation or season. Incorporating more positive thoughts can help to make that shift. And something that has helped me find the good throughout the day is a gratitude journal.
Keeping a gratitude journal doesn’t have to be a major commitment. You can use a small notebook or the notes app on your phone. You can write (or type!) everything at night, or add in a few gratitudes throughout the day.
If you don’t want to write them down, don’t stress! You could text a close friend or share them with your spouse.
The most important part is looking for positive parts of your day – you’ll start to find good where you least expect it.
Re-frame to Re-train
The ultimate goal is to reframe your mindset so you can retrain your brain. If you proactively work on the way you see and handle situations, you’ll begin to rework your thought patterns. Then, you’ll be on your way to overcoming the negativity you’re feeling.
If you try any of these mindset shifts this week, I want to cheer you on! Send me a text and let me know how it went.